back to the Black Table
           
  WEEK IN CRAIG: A MESSAGE FOR YOU BLOOMIE.  
  Amy Blair    
   
 

In case you were wondering why there were three cops at your subway stop this morning stationed at a highly official government-issued folding table asking random people to open up their diaper bags to make sure they weren't loaded with dynamite, let me be the first to break the news to you … the city of New York has authorized its police force to inspect the bags of any passengers intending to use the public transportation system, without warrants, without cause, and without authority.

In other news, they have decided to pin scarlet letter "A"s to the dresses of any women who engage in adulterous behavior.

They will also be retaining the right to burn witches as they see fit.

Finally, Mayor Bloomberg has issued an ordinance that black people must sit at the backs of buses until further notice.

As could be expected, a lively and intellectual debate over the issue was quickly ignited over at craigslist…

Don't search my bag, strip search me

I wouldn't mind a big strong police officer strip searching me in Grand Central Station. And then taking his belt and spanking me like the spoiled brat that I am. Come on Bloomberg, make my fantasy come through. Why just stop at searching bags? Some of those cops are hot!!!!

Excellent idea, my friend! Although, I'd like to take it one step further. I'd like Mayor Bloomberg to conduct the strip teases (oops, I mean strip searches) himself. Bust out those rubber examination gloves, Bloomie, here I come!

Will someone please...

...pack a duffel bag full of doughnuts and walk through Penn Station? ...and take pictures of their face when they search you.

After reading the two posts above, as usual I found myself suddenly craving a French cruller and a good spanking, but I wasn't quite sure whether the craigslisters had really verbalized my feelings on the subject of random bag searches on the subway. So, as I frequently do when I'm at a loss for words, I quickly headed into the m4m section for some good gay porn and a little help sorting out my emotions. I think this collection of headlines pretty much sums it up.

Hey Bloomie…

EAT MY ASS FOR LUNCH - 12 -2PM - 33

black, 7cut, 33y.o., 160lbs. any hungry rimmers out there?

Then…

suck my dick - 29

good looking guy 29 6ft3 180 half black half white masculine hairy well hung uncut. looking to sit back and relax and get my dick sucked on. right now, lower east side. let me know what's up.

Oh, and while you're at it…

Fuck your punk ass - 30

masculine handsome hung white top looking for a younger guy who's ready for a great fuck. i'm pretty dominant and aggressive, can get a bit rough. your place. now. pic/stats for same.

To put it plainly…

Suck it - 27

Handsome cleancut fit guy with a hard on and a hot clean load, looking for a hot mouth to give me some relief. host or travel nearby.

In case you still didn't get it…

$ize 13 Feet for your Face - 23

Masculine 23yo verbal top. 6'3, 195, 9 in. cut, size 13 feet, mixed Black and Asian. Available for generou$ men into fetishes of all types: foot worship, w/s, etc. Email me for rates and more pics.

Hey, here's an idea…

I have a big load for your warm lips.

Ready now.

Oh, and one more thing, for good measure…

Come over and suck it

37 6'2 handsome guy, im looking for a cocksucker to cum over and service my nice dick, send your face pic for mine

P.S. Please don't stone me to death for writing this … I was, like, totally just kidding!!

 

Want More?

Hit up The Week in Craig Archive.

 

Amy Blair, winner of The Village Voice's "best website's summary of another website" award, is eager to be called horrible names on Craig's List. Bring it.