|WEEK IN CRAIG: STRIKE BABIES COMING IN NINE MONTHS.|
A few years ago, after drinking one too many margaritas in Hell's Kitchen with my friend Anastasia, we boarded the subway to head downtown. It was about 11 p.m., and when we got onto the train there was only one passenger in the car, plus one other man who got on at the same time as us. As soon as the doors closed (conveniently!) the man who had previously been alone in the car stood up, started pacing about, and talking to himself in an increasingly agitated manner. His anger escalated within seconds. He punched the wall. He yelled. He pulled at his hair. And then, to our terror and amazement, in a final act of jaw-dropping cuckoo, just before the train pulled into the station and freed us, he did something truly...awesome. With a crazed yelp he took off sprinting down the length of the car. Running full speed, he sprang into the air like Daniel LaRusso on crack, in an effort to drop-kick the other passenger on the train (for no overtly apparent reason).
Anastasia and I remained glued to our seats, dumb-struck and drunk. The other passenger let out a "fucking hell" and jumped out of the way. The crazy dude landed and started screaming nonsensically again, and then the doors opened and we all ran off.
So, like, didn't you just miss the subway terribly over the past couple of days? We're talking about transit strike, folks. The people united will never be defeated, or something like that.
Riding the new jersey path seeing all those straight married suburban new jersey men has made me horny as fuckin hell! Especially knowing that their wives cant and dont suck on their beautiful cum filled cocks! I am a hot queerboy who loves to suck straight men for the first time and give them the best deepthroating, cock slurping spitting licking, sucking on your balls, and eating your asshole til you cum the best you ever have. I love get cum squirted all over my whore face. I am so hot now if i suck dick i will be crying out like a fucken bitch and sucking it as deep fast and hard as i can til you shoot so good whiel watching girl/guy porn fucking..You: white, 20s-50s, married, circumcised, Me: hot as hell for your big juicy cock and hot white creamy load! free,discreet,no reciprocation, drug and disease free(you too), lets meet, now or whenever!!!
God bless this hapless faggot. If the day ever comes when I see a New Jersey PATH train filled with straight, suburban, married men and I suddenly find myself "horny as fuckin hell!" please just get me the Kovorkian suicide machine. Please?
Has the transit strike left you with an insatiable desire to make out? Yes, I understand. Me too.
Ok, so you are preferably nearby, preferably smart, and preferably sexy as hell. I'm an advanced level kisser looking for a suitable partner this evening. A bit of conversation first to determine if we are compatible, and then, as they say, we'll take it from there...
I'm an advanced level kisser with a degree in mathematics, a love of video games, and I've won no less than six Scrabble tournaments in the past 3 months! Let’s touch tongues! Afterwards it would be delightful if we could discuss Big Bang Theory while enjoying some quiet chamber music.
Isn't it ironic that on the second day of the transit strike the New York magazine is delivered to my door with the cover "123 Reasons to Love New York Right Now"?!
Let me start a Transit Strike version of this:"___ Reasons to "Love" a NYC Transit Strike"
1. Hipster buttcrack on the Wburg bridge
While walking across the Manhattan Bridge on Tuesday morning, I wasn’t exactly what you would call the happiest camper at Frosty Pines Day Camp. I had a cold. It was 20 degrees outside. And this was the third time in four years that I’ve had to walk for hours to get home (hello 9/11, black-out, and now transit strike). I wasn’t complaining. I just wasn’t exactly my usual chipper self (heh). To my horror, I was forced to witness not one…not two…but THREE dumb-ass chicks riding their bikes to work wearing skirts and…cowboy boots. What the fuck??! This wasn’t like 9/11 or the black-out where all of us left for work having no idea that we were going to wind up trekking for hours to get home later in the day. These broads PLANNED to bike (at least the length of the Manhattan Bridge, and I’m certain more) in these get-ups. Hey, at least they looked cute. Errr…
30 year old male, decent body, not bad to look at, with Vespa. Transit strike means nothing to me! Door to door service within Manhattan in exchange for a little lovin'. Please be female, under 40, and ready for a fun ride.
Along with frogs and locusts, isn't some dude offering sex for scooter rides one of the signs of the Apocalypse? Bust out those rosary beads, people, and kiss your asses goodbye.
Take advantage of all that time in traffic to meet other singles. Gay car pool now available in Brooklyn! Looking to drive entertaining blokes to their day and have a laugh in all that gridlock.
I'll provide an old saab, we'll leave from park slope-ish.
I fucking love the gays.
The best sex lube is NOT Astro Glide, it isn't KY. I gave each of them a try and a few others besides but now I select just one brand. It's Slippery Stuff. You can get it at Toys in babeland but I haven't seen it anywhere else.
Now you can thank me for recomending somthing thats going to help you get off better than ever AND thank me for posting somthing totatly unrelated to the transit strike.
Point well taken. Now get back to work, assholes. The transit strike is like so yesterday.