THEY'RE HERE! THEY'RE WEIRD! GET USED TO IT!



THEY'RE HERE! THEY'RE WEIRD! GET USED TO IT!
Photos by Frank Smith & Audrey Ference		08.31.04

Throughout American history, dissent has played a vital role in shaping the political agenda. Without tea-dumping Pilgrims in red-face, there'd be no Colonial war, and without stinky hippies, the Vietnam War may have lasted a full three decades. Protest is a good thing. But it's also hilarious. So, sit back, flex your index finger and prepare to point and laugh, kids. Point and laugh.
You rack your brains for hours to come up with a clever slogan. You carefully write it neatly on a sign. You wake up early to get a prime seat in front of that Starbucks. And yet, those yuppie assholes continue to stream in for their venti soy lattes.	As an art movement, Cubism was a rousing success. As a design motif for a protest costume ... not so much.
Pop quiz. Who's weirder: a.) The George Clinton P-Funk lookalike with the huge white feet? Or, b.) The bald fat guy who is following him, wearing a stars-and-stripes bandana across his gigantic middles? There's no wrong answer here, we're just askin'.	Every time some lost tourist asked Joe for directions during the RNC convention, he immediately squatted down, cut loose a righteous fart and screamed, "NEXT STOP, 14TH STREET!" The tourists didn't like it, but it kept Joe sane.
"Yeah, you know, I mean, the XLR totally offers the best resolution in its class, but if you're really serious about getting the best poses, it's gonna take a shitload of chloroform and a rag."	In high school, Gary won two superlatives: "Most Likely To Endorse a Fringe Candidate" and "Least Likely To Do Anything Serious Enough To Warrant Being Arrested During a Protest March."
You know what they say about a guy with big lenses ... big lens caps.	As Republicans take the M16 and M34 buses over the next three days, they'll be faced with this constant reminder of the one demographic they'll never win back: Blue balloons.

Want More? DAY 5: NOW IT'S TIME TO SAY GOODBYE, TO ALL OUR COMPANY... DAY 4: EVERY NIGHT SHE JUST CAN'T STOP, I SAID NEW YORK CITY COPS... NEW YORK CITY COPS... DAY 3: SCENES FROM THE FOX NEWS SHUT UP A-THON. DAY 2: THEY'RE HERE! THEY'RE WEIRD! GET USED TO IT! DAY 1: WELCOME TO NEW YORK CITY, PLEASE GO HOME NOW. Click to Visit the RNC Archive.